Killer Whales
From JUOD
Killer Whales are the primary exception to Harley P. Mathewson's declaration that all whales are non-joiners. Not only does he appreciate the name ("It's as if they encompass what a true joiner should be," Mathewson has said, "a killer of non-joiners"), but he appreciates how their black and white appearance is a strong metaphor for joining: "It's simple really," Mathewson has said. "Join, and join the light, fail to join, and fall into the black abyss. Though I in no way mean to imply that anything like Occam's Razor is true. Word on the street that guy, William of Ockham, was a huge fag."
Exception to the Exception
Mathewson has, however, made an exception to the exception. In 1970 or 1971 he visited Sea World in San Diego. At Sea World, Mathewson watched the famous Shamu perform. During the performance, Mathewson caused much stirring when he yelled at the whale to "Kill the performer! She's riding you like French whore on Ben Franklin! Kill her! You're a killer whale for Christsakes!" Angered that the whale was instead peaceful and playful, Mathewson immediately declared an exception to the exception, determining that Shamu was a non-joiner. Apparently the whale felt some regret for this, as later it did attack one of the Sea World performers, eventually leading to its retirement and death. Still, Mathewson refused to change his non-joiner pronouncement (as he never does, really) and then proceeded to label all later performing Killer Whales at Sea World non-joiners.
